I was dancing last night with a man who impressed me, once again, with his listening. I’m thinking, do I mean “his listening skills”? Yes, that, and also his intention to listen, his commitment to it. I told him once that I prefer dancers who focus less on the “moves” — the twirls and fancy footwork — than on being in the music with your partner. Every time I dance with him, I can tell he remembers.
I mentioned that I like this about him, and, I suppose not surprisingly, he said he considered that high praise. It’s kind of delightful when somebody praises us for something we ourselves value and work at. Sometimes you’re not sure anybody else notices.
He took the question of listening further, by sharing a thought from a friend who, several years ago, said something like, ‘If you want to change somebody’s mind, it’s easier to do it by listening to them than by talking.’
I’m carrying that thought.